Tuesday, 30 October 2012

Why is a pointless word


How, how did it happen to me. Just a thought. I used to think that this would somehow pass me by. Or I’d say I had never ever imagined a cave that dark, that wet and cold… with ice covering these cold walls… But it’s just the beginning. And there I see those tiny creatures with luminous tails… my dear soulmates… glowworms… and music in my heart. That’s about all in my suffocating cave… And memories of sunshine… too… that’s about all… But this music is so crystal beautiful… so may be this all is worth it after all… Time is drifting away, buring me alive in my dreams.
Too simple isn’t it. Life is way more complicated. A couple of days ago, in the large conservatory hall, high above the room, contemplating the crowd from the upper row, looking over the people sited in a geometrical order of the ancient amphitheatre… I thought that we are somehow all connected. That is so weird and perfect at the same time.
Now that we have social networks it is even closer to the truth. But we are more connected in our thoughts than in things.
I am so tired of forcing myself to survive and struggle.
Where is the wind for my sails? Have I missed it?
Well, talking about my new job. I picked it up a month ago now. Wow, time goes by fast. It’s been a month already. New routines, new algorithms, new words, new people smells and obstacles, a coffee overdose, heartbeat and breath stumble, no sleep… no window… time goes by… I am back to where I had been.
Still dreaming of my unpainted pictures. Me having a brush in my right hand.
And this all leads me to this ugly scratch of typewriting.  
“Why” is sometimes a very pointless word.
Paris is a huge library.
I want to breakthrough. Won’t you stop me there. 

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