How, how
did it happen to me. Just a thought. I used to think that this would somehow
pass me by. Or I’d say I had never ever imagined a cave that dark, that wet and
cold… with ice covering these cold walls… But it’s just the beginning. And
there I see those tiny creatures with luminous tails… my dear soulmates… glowworms…
and music in my heart. That’s about all in my suffocating cave… And memories of
sunshine… too… that’s about all… But this music is so crystal beautiful… so may
be this all is worth it after all… Time is drifting away, buring me alive in my
dreams.
Too simple
isn’t it. Life is way more complicated. A couple of days ago, in the large conservatory
hall, high above the room, contemplating the crowd from the upper row, looking
over the people sited in a geometrical order of the ancient amphitheatre… I
thought that we are somehow all connected. That is so weird and perfect at the
same time.
Now that we
have social networks it is even closer to the truth. But we are more connected
in our thoughts than in things.
I am so
tired of forcing myself to survive and struggle.
Where is
the wind for my sails? Have I missed it?
Well, talking
about my new job. I picked it up a month ago now. Wow, time goes by fast. It’s
been a month already. New routines, new algorithms, new words, new people
smells and obstacles, a coffee overdose, heartbeat and breath stumble, no sleep…
no window… time goes by… I am back to where I had been.
Still
dreaming of my unpainted pictures. Me having a brush in my right hand.
And this
all leads me to this ugly scratch of typewriting.
“Why” is
sometimes a very pointless word.
Paris is a
huge library.
I want to
breakthrough. Won’t you stop me there.
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